Things We Lost In The War: Vietnam

Every major city has its “thing”- the attraction, the event, or the entertainment that pulls in tourists; Orlando has Disney World, Cairo has the Pyramids, Gary, Indiana has Michael Jackson and the list goes on. Ho Chi Minh City (HCMC) is no different than any other city except that its “thing” is war, specifically, the Vietnam War or the “Vietnam Conflict” as we learned to call it in school or the “American War” as the Vietnamese call it. For a place whose tourist industry is focused on such a brutal time in our history, it amazes me that HCMC is one of the happiest places I’ve travelled thus far and I could actually see myself living here.  Let me rephrase this: I actually could have seen myself living there; until we went to the War Remnants Museum.

OMG…

Initially our plan was to spend just 2 days in HCMC and then move on to Cambodia. However, once we (mom and I) got there and I learned that I could shoot an AK-47 and an M-16 at the gun range on the Cu Chi Tunnels tour… Well, as you can imagine, that whole plan went to the crapper. Where else am I going to get the opportunity to shoot guns like that?! Side story:  I actually said this to an Australian traveller I met in HCMC and with genuine incredulity he said, “You’re American! Don’t you have access to guns like that all the time?!”

Notre Dame

Crickets…. How do you respond to that?

It occurred to me in the moment, that some people really see Americans as gun toting, war mongers from the Wild, Wild, West! Not one to disappoint, mom and I booked another day at the hotel because although I’m not a “gun person” (I’ve actually NEVER fired a gun in my life), I’ve seen enough gun toting, war monger, and Wild, Wild, West movies starring Steven Segal to know that this might be a ridiculously cool experience.

So, we laid out our plan of attack.

Day 1: Delta team will get some much needed R&R and wake up at oh-eight-hundred hours on Day 2 to go on a self-guided expedition of the Notre Dame cathedral, the Post Office, Reunification Palace (Hoi Truong Thong Nhat), Ben Thanh Market, and the War Remnants Museum. Day 3 will commence with a half day tour of the Cu Chi Tunnels and will terminate with dinner. We will evacuate the premises by boat along the Mekong Delta, destination Cambodia, on Day 4.

Street vendors sell EVERYTHING!

Day two began and off we went. HCMC is awesome! The downtown area is amazingly easy to navigate and most of the “attractions” are in one area. Further, there are quite a few parks to sit and people watch and even more street vendors selling food and other goodies, so spending time outdoors without a guide is stress free and very pleasant. Crossing the streets can be a bit challenging though, but locals are always willing to help even with that!  Did I mention that it’s really cheap too! After lunch at this cool jazz restaurant where my paella dish and mom’s fried shrimp plate cost us an equivalent of $7 USD, we headed to the War Remnants Museum.

Napoleon is quoted as having said that, “History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon." For me, this explains why the Vietnamese perspective of the war looks nothing like what was taught in school.

Let me preface the rest of this post by saying, “THIS IS WHY I TRAVEL!!”

The War Remnants Museum is littered with things we lost in the war: tanks, planes, shells, guns, our minds etc. The first floor is filled with news clippings from around the world explaining and condemning the events occurring during the war. As the floors increase, the gravity and sadness of the past intensifies with names, ages, and pictures of villagers killed, photos of American soldiers carrying disemboweled corpses, and journalist’s recollection of horrific tales of torture and abuse. Further, with statistics and pictures of disfigured people and children born as recent as six years ago, the museum catalogs the lingering after effects of Agent Orange on the soil and the population. They also show how a plethora of unexploded mines in the country side have affected people even today.

OMG…

The Tunnels! Wayyyy tooo small!

Within ten minutes of entering the museum I had stopped taking photos. Thirty minutes later, my stomach was turning and I was sweating something fierce. One hour later, I leaned over and told me mother that there was no way in hell she was wearing that American Flag t-shirt she packed, while walking with me in Vietnam. “You can be proud without making us a walking target!”

Although I understand that there are always three sides to every story and I was appreciative of having gained another viewpoint, I couldn’t shake the melancholy that came over me. Do I really want to shoot guns tomorrow?

Answer: Um… YES!!

What' s my name?!

In my head he has Rick James' voice...

Drive thru fast food window - Vietnamese Style!

Fresh fruit at the market.

The Post Office is GORGEOUS!

Upgrade Ya: Vietnam

So far I've been doing the backpacker thing (e.g. hostels, trains, walking, hanging laundry on the line, etc.) and I'm surviving; as a matter of fact, I'm thriving. I never imagined living with so few resources or access to "everyday luxuries" and loving it. Now, my mother took a vacation from her job ("like regular people do") and decided to join me as I travel through Vietnam, Laos, and Thailand and I wasn't sure that the "backpacker lifestyle" would suit her, so I warned her beforehand.

Her Response: "I'm cool. I'm down. I can do it."

I responded, "Okay," while I simultaneously booked a hotel instead of hostel for our first stop in Hanoi. (Upgrade!)

Ho Chi Minh's Memorial

I know my mother...

The hotel picked her up at the airport and she bounded in wearing Fila Skeletoes and carrying her reinforced backpack with its anti-theft straps that she ordered online at some specialty travel store. "Where did you find this place? It looks crazy outside! I hope you registered this address with the US Consulate," she said as she unpacked her backpack chocked full of pharmaceuticals and immediately began cleaning up our hotel room. After she demanded that I have the hotel launder my clothing instead of doing it myself (Upgrade!), I began side stepping her questions by telling her our plans for the next few days.

Me: "We are going to go to Ho Chi Minh's Memorial, the night market, Halong Bay and a few temples and pagodas."

Arms must be covered to enter?! Does this work?

Mom: "How are we going to get there? I know you've been avoiding tours, but it's not safe to go without someone."

I know my mother...

I had already booked our tours for the following days (Upgrade!) and along we went. We enjoyed our day at Halong Bay and met a great family from Australia. We even had fun on our tour of the city and decided to spend our last full day in Hanoi just shopping.

Out of all the things that could have happened in Hanoi, the one thing that I didn't want to happen, happened!


WAIT FOR IT....

My mother was pick pocketed while we were shopping. Lovely (insert heavy sarcasm here)...

A crippled, older, man saw her put her money in her back pocket and immediately started hopping around us while someone else was offering to polish my mom's shoe. The man brushed up against my mom and she instantly checked her pockets. Before I could coherently hear her say, "He took my money," she was already chasing him down! I turned around just as she grabbed him and spun his crippled tail around so fast that he did a pirouette on his good leg. "Give me back my money," she screamed as she ripped the money back out of this man's hand. I don't know who was more stunned, me or the man who stole her money!

Whoa... Mom's a gangsta! I don't know crap about my mother...

Halong Bay!

Adrenaline kicked in and my mom started walking fast and back towards the hotel. "I don't like this! I want to go to the hotel now! This isn't safe! I can't believe you are traveling like this!" After getting her to calm down, I convinced her that we should continue our day. "Why stop now? You just kicked an old man's ass and it's only 11 am!" We ended up laughing about the entire situation and she agreed to stay, but going to the night market was out of the question. The following day, we packed up our stuff and made it out to the train station.

Since the bus ride from Hanoi, Vietnam to Luang Prabang, Laos has been described as "the bus ride from hell" by many travellers on Lonely Planet, I also changed our travel plans for the remainder of the trip and booked train tickets down the Reunification Express from Hanoi to Hue and then Hue to Ho Chi Minh City (Upgrade!). I figured we could travel up through Cambodia to Thailand, instead of  across Laos. I'm happy I did this, because after the first train ride my mother was DONE!

"This train is nasty! I'm sleeping on my bags!"

Mom: "The next leg is 19 hours! I don't think so."

As soon as we got to the hotel in Hue, she cancelled the remainder of our train tickets and booked airline tickets (Upgrade!).

While in Hue, mom decided to try it my way and ditch the tours, so we compromised. She booked a private car and a driver to drive us to Hoi An.(Upgrade! Serious Upgrade!) Unfortunately, the driver was pulled over by the police for speeding and we ended up being held for well over an hour waiting for a replacement driver. Lovely (enter heavy sarcasm here) ... We still don't know what the hang up was, but being held on the side of the road by the Vietnam Police can throw a wrench into any day trip, so we ended up back at the hotel.

The following day we tried to recapture our site seeing day by renting a pair of bicycles for two hours and touring Hue on our own. When travelling I like explore by literally getting lost in neighborhoods and eating and shopping at random places. Unfortunately, my mother was still suffering from PTSD from her Hanoi experience and after realizing what I was trying to do, she cancelled that bike trip. Our two hour trip was cut down to thirty minutes and she hired two cyclo drivers to bike us around the city. (upgrade!)

I know that mothers are supposed to teach their daughters what to expect in life in terms of standards, but I think my mother just screwed me. As we head to Ho Chi Minh, I'm wondering if I'm going to be able to get back to my backpacker lifestyle once she leaves or if I've been spoiled beyond repair. Whatever the case, I now know two things: 1) I won't be doing my own laundry for awhile and 2) I definitely can't wait until the next family member or friend decides to join me; this is a nice reprieve from my new normal.

Thanks Mom!

The caves at Halong Bay!

Yes, that's a baby on the front!

Purple Palace

Our Australian Friends!

Ho Chi Minh's private quarters

Nine West in Hanoi!

Random Thoughts and Highlights: China

1. The Great Wall should be re-named the Great Haul, because that is a work out if I've ever seen one. It's not flat at all, it's up a mountain side and the sheer number of people pushing and shoving is manic! Also, if I see one more chick with stilettos climbing the Great Wall, I'm going beat her with them. Sheesh... talk about inappropriate footwear.

2. Someone needs to fix the sign on the Great Wall Entrance. Really?? This is the freaking GREAT WALL!!

3. Black Folks, just a heads up... The Chinese word for "um" or any other filler word you can imagine is "NAGE". It's  pronounced "nay-gur", but phonetically is sounds like the N-word. Be prepared to hear this more times than you'd think was possible if you take a trip there. As a matter of fact, listen to anyone's conversation around you and count how many times they say "um", "well", "uh", etc., then fill that in with the N-Word. Crazy huh? If you could have seen my face the first time I heard it... "Oh, so China is gonna be like this.." After the 50th time, I had to ask somebody because it was getting out of hand.

4. Tiananmen Square is really a site to see! My first conscious memory or thought of China is wrapped up in that historical image of the man waving the flag in front of those tanks in Tiananmen Square. I recall watching this on television with my parents, so to actually be there and read about the historical consequences and reasons for that event was like completing a full circle for me. Further, the grandeur of the square, the Forbidden City and all of the surrounding buildings is a tangible glimpse of the scale of China's ambitions; they think BIG!

5. Black folks just a heads up: I have never in MY LIFE had so many people stop, stare, point or ask to take pictures of me. I felt like P-Diddy or Manute Bol and I needed a day rate - seriously. I held babies. I posed with uncles, grandmothers, and teenage boys and in the end I came to two conclusions. First, Black Americans need to travel to China more! It's 2011 and there isn't a place on earth where we should still be viewed as an anomaly. Secondly, the Chinese need to learn the act of subtle gawking. I'm just saying...

I don't know these people!

This little boy wouldn't stop pointing!

Took a picture with the entire family!

6. Shanghai is so cool! In every country I've been in, I've found at least one city or area where I could say, "I'd live there"; Shanghai is that place. It reminds me of New York with its central park, museums, coffee houses and shopping areas. It even has a financial district and the skyline is incredible. The nightlife is amazing as well. Shanghai gets an A+++ from me.

7. Beijing's arts district, 798, is a must see. They don't advertise it heavily in "tourist magazines", but it will give you an entirely new perspective of China. It's a blend of Soho, SF's Haight Street, and Denver's Lodo all rolled into one. The shops are amazingly creative loft spaces and the streets are filled with art. It is the literally the largest public art display that I have ever seen and it needs to be on everyone's must do list.

 

Freaking Lychee!

Aggie has made it her mission to introduce me to all of types of foods I’ve never seen before. “Try this! It’s delicious,” she always says right before she orders me a heap of something. Food is never good or great, it’s always “delicious.” Surprisingly, she’s right.

Today, she wants me to eat a fruit that her Chinese to English dictionary says is “Lychee.” I’m weird about fruit though. At 33 I feel as if I should know all of the fruit that is out there: Mango, Starfruit, Lemons, Plums, Bananas, etc. So when someone is introducing a “new fruit” to me, I’m skeptical. “When did this arrive on earth?” I’ve heard about lychee though, but I’ve never seen this before.

“Try it,” she says. “It’s delicious.” I try it and in the back of my mind I’m wondering how do you say “Epi Pen” in Chinese. It’s delicious though and I end up eating five back to back. It’s really sweet with a citrusy after taste, similar to a kiwi, and I’m enjoying myself immensely. I’m reaching for another when I notice that my tongue is tingling and the corners of my mouth feel raw; like I’ve eaten too many sour patch kids. “It will go away,” I think to myself as I abandon the idea of just one more.

Do you know what this fruit is?

One hour later, my tongue is now itching and I feel like tilting my head back and sucking on a tube of Cortizone. On my way to the train station, I began mentally berating myself for not knowing my limits. Try means try, not back up a trough to the buffet!

I get on the train, passing by families, a hella rowdy group of men shooting the breeze and single travellers like myself. No Americans, no westerners, no black folks. I’m getting used to it by now. This time I’m on a hard sleeper train, which is six bunks to a berth instead of four and no doors. I settle into my bunk and this elderly grandma type immediately takes a liking to me. She’s firing off in rapid Chinese and smiling and when she realizes that I don’t speak Chinese she starts pointing to my arms. I don’t know if she’s saying that I’m strong or fat, but I just nod, smile and try to get comfortable with my new family.

After a while, several more people show up and it quickly becomes clear that someone is in the wrong place. I hand my train pass to grandma in hopes that it’s not me and she reads it out loud. Everyone begins pointing in the opposite direction and pointing at numbers I swear I didn’t see before. Rightttt….. I’m in the wrong bunk. I gather my things and head to the other end of the train and of course, I’m in the berth with the rowdy bachelor party I passed earlier.

As soon as I show up, someone yells, “LOAWAI, Hello!” Laowai means foreigner in Chinese. They know I’m confused and was in the wrong place and everyone starts cracking up. I’m super embarrassed, but thankfully I can laugh at myself.  Apparently my laughter breaks the ice because someone immediately starts breaking out bags of food. “LOAWAI, Hello!” they are saying as they pass me hands full of bright red, prickly balls – freaking LYCHEE!!

These are some of the nicest, uncle types I’ve met in China and understanding the significance of sharing food, a proverbial olive branch, I peel the lychee eat two more and then offer them the food I’ve brought with me. “Father God, please help me. These are delicious.”

Who's the Boss?

 

I’d never thought I’d be walking through the streets of China barefoot on my way to Kentucky Fried Chicken like some backwoods bama on a food run, but oh… here I am. It’s July 12, 2011 and Aggie insists that I eat a little something before getting on the bus that will take me to the train that will take me to another train that will get me to Vietnam.



Soaked to the bone and barefoot!

Why no shoes, why KFC, and who is Aggie you might be wondering…

Well, the reason we have no shoes on is because the term “rainy season” means much more than I suspected. It’s raining cats and dogs and elephants out here and for some odd reason the streets of China are paved in tile; it’s actually the sidewalks. If you’ve ever ran through your bathroom while the floor is still wet, then you know what it feels like to walk around China during the rain. So instead of taking one more un-lady like face plant in public, I did like the locals and kicked off my shoes.  Problem solved… yuck.

Why KFC?

KFC is almost on every other block in China, sometimes two on the same block; it’s the fast food of choice. Watermelon vendors are also in excess, but I abandoned the idea of explaining the irony to Aggie; she just wouldn’t get it. We ended up at a grocery store instead of KFC because, quite frankly, I rarely touch the stuff in the U.S so I’m definetly not doing it in China.

Which brings me to the next question: who is Aggie?

One of the benefits of my previous job at Nine West was that I got the opportunity to work with people from all around the world. Since I was on the production side of the business, I corresponded daily with various agents from China or wherever else we were producing shoes. Working with the same agents year after year, but having never met in person, you begin to reference them to others by first name. You even start to assign them personalities, understand their feelings through different quirks in their writing and occasionally, during holidays and special occasions, you send and receive personal greetings, cards, and photos; but for the most part it’s all business.

Last Christmas our department took our regular Christmas photo and we emailed it to all of our counterparts saying “Merry Christmas!” Since China sleeps while we work and vice versa, the next day I received an email from Aggie, a China agent who I talk with frequently, asking if I could label the people just from production, so that her team could see who is who. “Sure, why not.” I sent the email with the labels. The following day I received another email, “Oh, look at you! You have such a baby face! How old are you?”

“Baby face?!”

Who knew that that one email would spark a litany of back and forth emails between she and I. Over the course of the next few months, I began learning about her family, her life in China and she began learning about me.  So, when I told her about my trip and that I was coming to China, Aggie went to work! She began sending me information about hotels, trains, prices, crime, tourist attractions and anything else she could get her hands on. She honestly could put Frommer’s out of business.

The team at Paramount Asia!

“Are you coming to see us?”

“Absolutely! Let’s all have lunch!”


Now, Aggie and the team of girls she works with have been following my travels through my blog as best as they can (Blogspot is blocked in China). While I’ve been on the road, I’ve been getting emails from them expressing how they like this destination or that activity and how they couldn’t wait to show me around their city.  So, when I finally met up with Aggie, she brought Julie and I immediately said, “I’m the tourist, you guys are the guides. I’ll go wherever you want.” Aggie responded, “Here, Aggie is boss” and she and Julie began pulling out maps and notes and schedules and speaking in rapid Chinese.

Wow! Go to work!!

These girls are no joke!

I had no idea what she meant by boss, until she told me the schedule, booked my hotel in Guangzhou for me and absolutely refused to allow me to pay for anything. Whoa… So NOT in the plan… Way too generous. “No, Aggie is boss,” she said when I tried to literally wrestle her away from the cash register. We spent the next two days exploring tourist locations and parks in Guangzhou and shopping in wholesaler markets and eating everything in Donguan.

Seeing Aggie bargain is a sport! “You tell me if you like something and I’ll do the talking, but don’t show the merchant that you like it,” she suggests. Being the shoe hound I am, I immediately saw a pair of shoes I absolutely had to have. The style was original, the shoe was hot and the handiwork was real quality. “I love these! How much are they,” I asked the shop keeper, forgetting Aggies rule.



He pulls out a calculator and puts the price so I can see. Aggie looks over my shoulder, takes the shoe out of my hands and starts shaking her head and clucking her tongue. She’s pulling at the leather and poking the lining and telling him how the leather is inferior and the buckles they used are not worth the price. “Oh and look at the work around the toe! Where did you have these made?” By the time she finishes talking to the shop keeper and sporting her shoe knowledge, the price is now less than half of the original! The only problem is that now I’m not sure that I still really want it. “Dang, did I really want that piece of crap shoe!” I purchase it anyhow because dirt cheap is really too good to pass up. As soon as we leave the store, Aggie is high fiving me and jumping up and down. Oh I get it… We head to the next store and I step back and watch this miniature dirty Harry do her thing.

Aggie and her husband!

Later in the evening, I was speaking to my husband on Skype and complaining that she was spending too much and I needed to figure out how to pay her back. Aggie overheard my conversation and yelled “No, it’s okay! When we come to New York, then you can pay for everything because New York is more expense!” We all started cracking up laughing and my husband says, “Yo! She’s smart, but she’s got a deal!” 

Thank you Aggie!  She and her husband, as well as Julie, showed me a part of China that I wouldn’t have seen on my own, fed me and opened their home and I’m immensely grateful to call them friends.

Guangzhou's highest observation tower

Strolling through Guangzhou's parks

Newly married couples all over the park taking photos!

Lovely Architecture!