La Familia: Oakland & San Francisco, CA

My mom gave her this outfit!

If revisiting old friends allows you to reflect on how far you’ve come, then visiting family makes you remember that you still ain’t shit. Your family doesn’t care that you’re grown; your name is still Poop, Booch, Moose or whatever other unfortunate nickname stuck when you were a child; in my case it’s “Cakes”. Your family doesn’t care that you received your master’s degree; you’re still dumb as hell for dating little Tyrone in elementary school or cutting your hair into that lopsided style in the nineties.  Family is put on earth for one thing and one thing only; to lovingly bring you back to reality with the same finesse as a pimp slap.

If your family is small and gentle, then this may not apply to you. I, on the other hand, have a VERY large family and most of them live in California. My mother has nine living siblings and as a result of this, I have 40+ first and second cousins and they are all absolutely crazy. They are also some of the most generous, kind, and fun people alive. I literally hopped on the plane and texted my cousin on the way. "Can I crash at your place this week?" Answer: "Sure. I'll pick you up!" I don’t care if I’m coming back for a family reunion, the birth of a new baby, or a funeral, whatever the circumstances, I know that I’m going to have a place to sleep and will laugh until I have migraines; this time was no exception.

Things they wouldn't be caught dead in!

On my first day there, my Aunt Audrey threw a party and the theme was “I wouldn’t be caught dead in that!” Each person in attendance was supposed to wear a modern outfit that they wouldn’t EVER really wear in public.  My Aunt Tanya successfully attempted a Jersey Shore-esque/Peg Bundy look, while my Aunt Johnette wore an outfit that my mother bought her as a present (Soooo…. Wrong!!) It was fun, but I actually thought there was going to be an argument when my Uncle Tony refused to go to the grocery store to get ice for fear that someone he knew might see him wearing the worse suit and tie combo ever imagined. My cousins even got into the mix with their own versions of fashion misses; there were snagged tights with sandals, lots of fur and platforms, rings on every finger, and tie dye to boot. It was fantastic and I got plenty of pictures to blackmail family members for years.

The view from Baker Beach

It’s interesting, but going back to the place where you were born and seeing it through adult eyes can give you a new appreciation for many things.  Although I was born in Oakland, CA and lived there up until I was in the 6^th grade, as an adult I now have the ability to explore as I please. So this time around, I spent my time walking through the boutiques on Haight Street in San Francisco, sitting on Baker Beach and watching the waves come in for hours, and exploring the Golden Gate Bridge up close and personal. I even took the Treasure Island exit on the Bay Bridge! This doesn’t sound that exciting, but when I was a kid, we would pass this exit and I always wondered what was on it. I swore that it was California’s version of Fantasy Island and that Tattoo would come running out to meet us screaming “The plane, the plane!”

Disappointingly, there was no Tattoo, just a naval base and the best view of San Francisco I’ve ever seen. I sat in my car looking out over the bay, thinking about my youth, my family, and my coming destinations and it hit me: I’m truly free to explore and seek answers to any questions that I have. I can climb as high as my effort will allow, but it wouldn’t be possible to reach such heights without standing on the shoulders of the family that hold me up. They hold me up in their prayers, hold me up in their encouragement, and when I get too high for my britches, they knock my ass back down and reconnect me to the whole so that the next generation can climb onto my shoulders. I love my family and I wouldn't be caught dead with any other!